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June 08, 2006


For Crying Out Loud, People...
It’s Only A Fucking Baby!
$4.1 M For Jolie-Pitt Baby Pics Sets New Record (For Stupidity)

People Magazine has won the North American rights to publish the first photos of baby Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt by paying the couple a whopping $4.1 million according to published reports.

Celebrity magazines and tabloid newspapers around the globe have entered the bidding for regional rights as well, and experts expect that worldwide publishing rights to the photos could fetch close to $8 million.

Unfortunately, an early pic was leaked onto the internet and British magazine Hello, which has secured the U.K. publishing rights, has taken legal action to force web sites displaying the snap to take it down.
According to the couple’s wishes, the money raised from the sale of the photos, which were taken by Getty Images, will be donated to charities that benefit underprivileged children.

Because of the cost to secure the photos, some magazines plan to raise the newsstand price of their explosive issue by as much as 15%. And they believe the public will "snap" them up without a second thought.

Hustler publisher Larry Flynt, who attempted to secure exclusive rights to the shots for the adult magazine industry, had this to say when his offer of $1,000 didn’t win: "I really don’t understand what the big deal is. I mean (newborn babies) all look like hairless wrinkled monkeys anyway."

A.) Amen, Larry. And they drool and cry and shit and puke all the time.
B.) I heard Brad insisted on a C-section to save Angie’s vagina.
C.) Ha ha. Hairless wrinkled monkeys! Ha ha. He’s right.


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