#Finally! It’s A Motherfucking Girl!, But...Baby Swap Shocks Hollywood
Angelina Trades Newborn For Katie’s Baby Plus A Baby To Be Named Later
In a shocking turn of events that has all of Hollywood buzzing, Angelina Jolie
has given up her newborn child in a trade for the recently born baby of Tom Cruise
and Katie Holmes
"It’s simple," said one tinseltown publicist, "Publicity. Giving babies funny names just isn’t enough to keep their names in the papers anymore. Brad and Angie realize now that they have to play hardball with this baby thing in order to stay in the news. They learned that lesson after being in Africa."
Because Angelina Jolie’s star power dwarfs that of Katie Holmes, the deal was sealed when Cruise offered to throw in his and Katie’s second child. The two Hollywood couples wanted to make the switch while both babies were young. Angelina’s baby, a girl named Shiloh Nouvel Pitt-Jolie
, will take on the name of the Cruise baby, also a girl, who’s name is Suri
"Essentially, the babies just change identities. It’s done all the time in Cambodia," said a spokesperson for the couple, who’s spent the past month in Africa trying to avoid the paparazzi.
"The deal also guarantees to add another member to the Jolie-Pitt litter without forcing it through Angie’s vagina, which made Brad very happy."
Both couples have agreed on Mysterioso Hectagon Pitt-Jolie
as a name for the third child in the deal, regardless of whether it’s a girl or a boy.
A.) Enough with this freaking baby stuff already. I’m sick of it.
B.) It’s an interesting trade, though. Good for both couples as I see it.
C.) If I was Brad, I would’ve held out for a shot at Katie, too.#