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April 24, 2006


Cindy Margolis Wins Cooking Competition
See...She’s Not Just Another Pretty Face With Big Tits, Long Legs And A Perfect Ass

Internet beauty queen Cindy Margolis pulled out all the stops in her breathtaking victory last weekend on NBC’s Celebrity Cooking Showdown.

The dazzling blonde, who’s famous for almost taking off all her clothes on the web, got to the finals by ‘beating’ pro football tight-end Tony Gonzales and soap star Alison Sweeney in the first round of the week-long competition. Margolis then ‘whipped’ the winners of the other two rounds, Ashley Parker Angel, from MTV’s Making The Band, and 2005 Miss USA Chelsea Cooley, in the finals on Saturday.

In a bold move by NBC to redefine the word ‘celebrity’, singer Patti LaBelle, actor Tom Arnold, beach-volleyballer Gabrielle Reese and country singer Big Kenny were selected to be the other competitors in the Cook-Off, which was planned to cash in on the Iron Chef cooking craze.

The show was hosted by Alan Thicke.

Wolfgang Puck, who was one of the celebrity chefs that helped the so-called celebrities prepare full-course meals in just under an hour, said of Cindy: "She was just marvelous. I loved her spirit in the kitchen, and she looked great doing it."

Not many know that Puck started his showbiz career as the voice of Disney’s Professor Ludwig Von Drake before becoming a restaurateur and chef to the stars. Today he markets his own line of cooking products that includes TV shows, cookware, spices, prepared foods and cookbooks.

Cindy’s winning menu included "Bone-In Tenderloin in Cream Sauce" and her own "Sweet and Creamy Cherry Tart" for dessert. (Marty Sherman)

A.) Shall we dine in or carry out?
B.) Chef Cindy can ‘whip’ me anytime.
C.) Should I be getting a boner when I think about food?

Big Kenny: "I Was Robbed!"
One Half Of Country Duo Big & Rich Speaks Out

"My steak, cornbread and taters were head and shoulders better than any of that other high-fallutin’ crap. I feel like I was robbed because them judges think I’m a hillbilly," stated Big Kenny Alphin, the ‘big’ half of country duo Big & Rich.

Kenny, along with partner John Rich, vaulted to national attention with their 2004 release Horse of a Different Color. The CD reached the top spot on both Billboard’s national and country charts and featured the smash single Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy, which was used by ESPN in spots to promote its World Series of Poker in 2004.

Attempts by the duo to cross into the gay market were nixed when the song was turned down by producers of last year’s Oscar-winning film Brokeback Mountain for being "not subtle enough for the purposes of the narrative," according to one industry insider.

Big Kenny is currently consulting with the law firm of Dewey, Cheatham & Howe to see if he has any recourse against NBC for losing the Cook-Off.

"I think if them snooty judges had been honest with themselves, they’d have picked my grub, hands down," he said.

Partner John Rich agrees: "Kenny’s definitely the cook in this relationship. Everything he prepares is scrumptiously divine." (Marty Sherman)

A.) Yeeeehah!
B.) Ride ‘em Big Kenny!
C.) Just don’t make me watch. It turns my stomach.


holy shit! wolfgang puck was the voice of professor ludwig von drake????!!!!!! who knew!!!!

lyzak, please share some of the drugs you are obviously doing, you crazy fuck!
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