Before Coffee...Naomi Needs Jeans, Maid in Stitches!
Supermodel Naomi Campbell
, running late for an Oprah
appearance, asked her housekeeper Velma
(as good a name as any) to fetch her favorite jeans.
A limo sat outside waiting, the driver checking his wristwatch every few minutes.
Where were the jeans, damn it? Velma couldn't find them. Naomi fumed.
Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. Naoimi called Oprah, told her she couldn't find her jeans, hung up and started crying...crying like she had never cried before.
Her cries turned to anger.
She grabbed her cell phone and whipped it at the back of Velma's head. It may have been one of those RAZR phones because blood gushed from the maid's head...rivers of it...so much that when police came to the scene, one of the cops slipped and fell hitting his head on the floor.
Velma went to the hospital for stitches. As did the cop.
What happens next is anyone's guess, because when all is said and done--this was researched and reported before coffee.
Mmm, I can smell it brewing.
Okay, coffee's ready...stay tuned.
A.) Drink some quick, dude, you sound fuzzy.
B.) Yeah, he's probably hungover from drinking with big shot Marty Sherman.
C.) Pray Naomi, Velma, and the cop are all right.